Video: What You Need to Know About Shame & Parenting

Let’s talk about shame and parenting, because shame can often get in the way of finding ease, joy, connection and compassion… and parents are especially vulnerable to feeling shame.

Shame is an emotion that arises when we feel that we have failed to meet expectations because we think we are not good enough or we think that we're flawed in some way. And shame can be particularly acute when we think that someone is watching or judging us and can see our feelings and our flaws. Now, shame is closely related to guilt, which is more focused on action. Guilt is: I feel bad because I did something wrong, but I can do better. Shame is: I feel bad because this is who I am, which is not going to change. Guilt can be motivating and shame can be debilitating.